Following on from Part 1 issued earlier this week, CNFLE II reporters Carl Woodward and Bob Bernstein continue their post draft review by looking at probably the toughest Division of them all. ‘El Grupa de la muerte’, our Mexican counterparts sagely decreed.
As you cross the Styx, don’t forget to pay the ferryman.
All four Division 2 teams entered the Draft room around 7pm on that balmy Sunday eve to find, to their good fortune, that laying in wait for each of them was a 1st Round pick in the top half of the draft order. Ttttaylor grabbing the hallowed one spot, Yoda from Wales following at the deuce, The Bone Rocking in at 3 and Lottery picking at the half dozen mark.
As the countdown to the first pick diminished, the shuffling of papers became more frenzied, and the time for action growing closer and closer, the question still sitting tantalisingly on everyone’s lips was, Johnson or Peterson? Peterson or Johnson? Who would go first?
But really, was there ever any doubt? And when, despite Tttttaylors ttt-tantrum about tt-taking ttt-top spot, Jonathon duly obliged and secured the Beast Chris Johnson with the first-tt pick, the crowd went wild. The draft was ‘live!’ then the crowd went wild some more!! It was carnage!!
The camera flashes popped like the Superbowl kickoff itself as CJ shuffled off into the Tttttaylor locker room to be interviewed by Pam Oliver for Fox Sports.
Followed next did Yoda, by snaffling last years #1, All day Peterson. Like a flash, as quick as he had broken the all time rushing record in Hubert H Humphrey Metrodome that November night, AP left the auditorium to commence with his jedi training. Watch out this season for defences parting like the red sea to let the young master through and the appearance of AP hovering oh so slightly off the floor as he makes those devilish cutbacks. Not sure about the new uniform though, little bit Cleveland (perhaps)? So then it was to the Bone at 3.
Preferring to keep his cards close to his chest, a plain unadorned helmet for the team logo paying testament to the Bone’s gridiron mantra ‘we will let the football do the talking’, the quiet man could see that a golden opportunity may have presented itself.
Mock drafts around the globe have generally has MJD or Ray Rice at the third pick, some even had Brees or Rodgers, but Coach Lars had perhaps prepared a pertinent repost to Ttttaylors pre draft lament that he ‘would have picked Gore if he hadn’t had top spot’.
Quelle surprise (apologies to Laurent) then when big Frank the Tank of San Fran came off the board next to gasps of shock and wide eyes of horror! Could a blockbuster trade be in the pipeline already? Watch this space if you please, shades of Manning Junior and ‘Cry me a’ Rivers all those moons ago?
Riggins then reached for Andre Johnson, French Leader grabbed Aaron Rodgers and then the spotlight fell on the Commissioner’s own Lottery.
Coach Andy had already made it know that once the top backs had gone there wasn’t a back left in the draft that you would bet your prize longhorn on, so in he swept picking at six, ignoring the falling MJD, Rice & Turner by taking the most prolific fantasy QB over recent years in Drew ‘Summer’ Brees. The Lottery had secured an elite play caller, and hoped to avoid a repeat of last year’s triple headed QB Lottery controversy.
The pulse rates stabilised, a sip of water (or something stronger in some quarters) was taken. The Division 2 first round picks for 2010 were in the locker. The real decisions were still to be made however, would the Group of Death make the most of their fortunate drafting positions or would their draft prove to be as painful as death by a thousand cuts?
Tttttaylor – Pick 1
Projected Points (from starting lineup) – 1750
Verdict : Grade A
A backfield duo of CJ and Benson will rack up the points which will form the keystone for Tttttaylors success over the coming season. Philly speedster DeSean Jackson has become new Eagles QB Kolb’s top pre-season target, although how well Kolb handles the NFC East blitzing schemes will determine how successful Jackson will be. Wallace & (Grommit – sorry couldn’t resist) Knox are set for breakthrough years with The Pitts and Da Bears respectively. Much is also expected of 3rd year play caller Joe Flacco who looks poised to impress in a much improved Ravens offense. This could be the year that Baltimore Joe comes of NFL age. Dallas Clark will continue to enhance his elite TE status. All the road signs point forward for Tttttaylor, and this team will definitely be in the mix come the end of season shake up. Much will depend on how the head to head matches with Yoda turn out.
Yoda From Wales – Pick 2
Projected Points – 1692 (1778 with Jackson)
Verdict : B+ (moving to A+ if Jackson hits the ground running)
With one of the elite backs in Peterson already stabled, pre-season surprise package Arian Foster was hauled in to provide a brace of heavy hitting backs for the Welsh wizards. With Jerome Harrison also in the mix Yoda has exciting options in the Welsh backfield. Houston gunslinger Shaub will score a hatful of fantasy points this year with the CNFLE II scoring system, and the top two receivers, fantasy studs Marshall & Owens, will also be regular 15+ points scorers provided they can behave themselves! Add to that duo, Vincent Jackson, then not only do you have the most combustible receiving corps in the League but probably the most talented. Antonio Gates at TE adds further quality to the team, and the acquisition of the No.1 ranked Jets D blows your mind, if of course, the Jets can convince Mr Revis to put his dummy back in. This isn’t a fantasy team, this is a fantasy fantasy team. No obvious weaknesses. All the way, Yoda could go if Jackson gets his act together.
The Bone Rocks – Pick 3
Projected Points - 1660
Verdict : Grade B / B-
Grabbing Gore with the 3rd pick could prove to be a masterstroke if he becomes part of a blockbuster deal to entice Johnson away from Tttttaylor. Even if he does not, Gore is still going to be a fantasy monster this year, as the Niners look to improve in all offensive areas. A brace of experienced receivers in Megatron & Jennings could prove lucrative points-wise or, knowing these two players, it could end up being a mildly frustrating season as they have been known to occasionally underwhelm. TE Davis is set for a big year, and Ronnie Brown will be a productive scorer until he gets injured in say week 8. The Bone took two nice QB options in Ryan & Palmer and both of those should provide a solid 20+ points per week, if not more if the Bone rotates them based on matchups. The Niners ‘D’ will benefit from facing weak Divisional opponents 6 times in a year. If the Johnson trade comes off, this team would be upgraded to serious contenders, but as it stands they are in the mix but an over reliance on the success of the 49ers could prove to be a problem for the Bone as the season wears on.
Its A Lottery – Pick 6
Projected Points from starting lineup – 1646
Verdict : Grade B-
Lottery’s over reliance on Brees could ultimately prove their downfall this year in a group that’s as tough as teak. Both big time receivers have question marks against them as Austin the afterburner may suffer from Dallas’s ‘O’ line woes, and Harvin’s health issues could cause headaches for the Commish. The RB’s are both decent options however, but in pass first teams where they will more than likely see most action when Indy and the Pack are comfortably ahead. Look for a lot of late points from Addai & Grant. The Commish has nailed his colours to the Massaquoi mast as the third receiver, but the jury is still out on all Cleveland players. Big Jason Witten will add a consistent 10 points per week, although the Commish will be hoping for better end zone production this year from the Dallas end. On the bright side, Austin’s loss may be Witten’s gain as Romo is forced to release earlier. This draft has produced a team that will yield a solid points return consistently each week. How much it varies from its baseline score depends on whether ‘Summer’ Brees makes Commish feel fine, by throwin’ all the spirals to the line’ (Ahem)
Whoooahh there Betsy, this division has it all, elite QB’s, the top two running backs in the game, a whole host of quality receivers, and the top four TE’s in the game today. It doesn’t take a genius to work out that whoever ultimately wins this Division will be in pole position to sweep the big prize.
This division is Dante’s 11th level of hell, an ‘old school rootin’ tootin’ beat ‘em up’ division, where it’s ‘last man standing’, and that man stands with a story to tell. If you like it tough, this is the place to be.
And there you have it, by jingo, the Division 2 review is complete. Again, should you disagree or take violent issue with any of the content, please contact League HQ, who will pass you over to our team of solicitors by way of 107 excruciating minutes of call centre music and incomprehensible buck passing.
Coming Monday, Division 3. The Group of Death Warmed Up.
BB & CW
Apologies to Paul for the error in Part 1. Doh!
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